Moms Need Me Time

Tina and her 2 children

Do you ever wonder, “Am I a bad mom if I want some me time?”

Some moms seem perfect on the surface, making it to every sports practice and school event. Some also juggle full-time work, myself included. During the first several years of our children’s lives, it’s hard for moms to get time to ourselves. I remember when a full night’s sleep was a dream.

But we can lose ourselves in motherhood. It often means forgetting to nourish what makes us unique while also trying to be the best mom. Ultimately, our kids will be better off if we also tend to our own needs.

Running a business takes a lot, and that alone is enough to drive a mom to a glass of wine and Netflix. But the end of the work day is merely a beginning. It’s then time to go home, make dinner, take the kids to extracurriculars, review homework, get everyone bathed, maybe do laundry and prep for the next day. It makes me tired just writing about it.

I was never good at keeping a routine. My resume before motherhood and owning my business reveals my restlessness. I had great jobs and always did well, but got antsy after a few years and moved on. I also enjoyed varied personal interests like motorcycles, snowboarding and poker.

When kids came along, it was the most incredible blessing. And it made me stable. I still worked full time, but all of my spare moments were dedicated to being the best mom I could be.

Not long ago, I was playing with my kids and they asked me what my hobbies were. I was at a loss. Um, I run a business… and I’m a mom? After telling them about what I used to love doing, I was then told by my own children that I really needed a hobby. So I got a few.

First, I picked up the ukulele, which I tried after visiting Hawaii years ago. The kids wanted to learn, too, so we started together. They also knew I tried roller derby when they were babies. My kids suggested I try that again, so with their support, I started training again.

It’s amazing how supportive my kids are. They really want me to have fun and succeed. And they are my biggest fans.

I also always loved traveling. Of course, doing it with kids gets a lot more expensive, but I do take mine on a snowboarding trip every other year to Colorado, where I grew up. They love it. I also try to take a short “girls’ trip” annually, something with a few other moms that makes us all feel human again.

My advice to all you hard-working moms out there: self-care is just as important as caring for your little ones, and you may be surprised how supportive they are of your interests outside the home. Taking on your own hobbies and excelling at them sets a wonderful example, too. Your kids need to know what an independent, active, well-balanced woman looks like. In fact, your kids will thank you for it!

Tina Lange is the Melbourne-based owner of Strategic Ink Public Relations. She has two children, Samantha, 12, and Alex, 9, two dogs and a growing list of hobbies.

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